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May 2018

A Mother’s Day Confession

They were not lying when they said that being a mom is a thankless job. Between packing lunches, folding laundry, kissing boo-boos, and wiping butts- it is a rare occasion that our duties get the appreciation that is deserved. We get one day each year where people around the world celebrate the beauty, strength, resilience, and love that moms selflessly give their children, however, I can’t help but wish we had a Mother’s Day each month! On this Mother’s Day, I am feeling defeated yet grateful- if that makes any sense! I am grateful that I have two healthy children but I am defeated with this past week as it has been tough to say the least. My husband has been out of town on business and sometimes just making it out the door in time for school is an accomplishment in itself. I have felt overrun, overworked, and simply exhausted. I have cried probably a dozen times this week because I am just sick of the constant battle that I face every day. My three year old can be compared to a wild animal and my seven year old has the attitude of a pubescent teen. Not to mention my two kids fight like rabid dogs. There is rarely a peaceful moment in the house where I don’t have to intervene and the kids take it up about 10 notches every time my husband leaves. Just yesterday I cried for most of the day out of pure stress and exhaustion. This morning it is Mother’s Day. I got a delicious box of chocolate from my sweet husband which I greatly appreciated- but no amount of chocolate can make up for the shit show that I have to endure while he is gone.

I can’t imagine what life is like for single moms who have to do this all of the time with zero help. At least my husband comes home and helps out so much. The kids listen a million times better when he is around and we hardly have bad days, let alone bad weeks! However, on this Mother’s Day, I am truly grateful for my children- no matter how naughty they can be or how shot my nerves can get. My son woke up this morning and all he wanted was for me to hold him and watch cartoons. Moments like this make all the stresses of the daily grind disappear. I re-read the Mother’s Day card my daughter made me at school and literally teared up. She wrote a sentence describing how much she loves when I take her on mommy-daughter dates and that she loves when I hold her hand because she feels safe. Moments like this make me feel like perhaps I am not doing a terrible job as a mom after all. My children, as cray cray as they can be- know that they are unconditionally loved by their Momma Grizzly and I thank the Lord every single day for them!

I don’t think there is a mother on this earth that feels like they are a perfect mom. Mothers are all learning as they grow, too! My philosophy is that if you are doing the best you can and your kids know they are loved, then that is enough. Motherhood isn’t always smash cake photo shoots, making homemade play dough, and doing baby sign language. Sometimes motherhood is filled with literal blood, sweat, and lots and lots of tears. Sometimes motherhood is just making it through another day will everyone accounted for. Sometimes motherhood is opening a can of spaghettios because you don’t feel like cooking dinner.┬áSo what if you didn’t get herb crusted salmon with risotto on the table tonight? So what if you didn’t have time to make sure teeth were brushed before school? Life happens and it is time we start being more gentle with ourselves throughout our journey as moms. Don’t compare your parenting style or your children to anybody else’s because comparison is the thief of joy. Just focus on being the best version of yourself that you can be, one day at a time. I am a personal development junkie and I found myself having such a stressful week that I have literally cried everyday. Am I going to let it get me down? Hell no! I am going to stand back up, wash my face, dust my shoulders off, and get ready to tackle another day. No matter how hard a day may seem— at least be grateful your children are healthy and alive. Like the seasons change- your tough time will pass, too! Please remember that struggle is a part of life and we need to honor the struggle from time to time!

From the bottom of my heart- I want to wish each and every single one of you a very Happy Mother’s Day. Know that you are appreciated, supported, and have a whole crew of fellow moms here at Mommaslay that are rooting for you! You can do it, no matter how hard it may seem! Happy Mother’s Day Mommaslayers!!!

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